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New Chapter

I feel whole. For the first time in my life I don’t need validation from others to feel that way. I feel like I’m enough, I’m learning to realize that I deserve good things, and I’m working to use my energy accordingly. In some way I feel it’s my responsibility to take what I’ve learned and use it to make the world around me a little better. I’m not trying to change anything or have delusions of grandeur. But I’ve noticed that when you approach people with the intention of building a bond and truly attempting to see them as well as showing your true self, it allows them (and you) to feel less alone. I think that’s what I’m good at. What’s the point of this conclusion? Well. My life just took a strange turn and without getting in to much detail I want to opine on why I’ve been able to adapt this mindset. I owe a significant portion of my life and heart to a partner who allowed me to see my potential by believing in me.

New chapters don’t have to be sad. You don’t have to approach endings with either animosity or sadness. Mourning the loss of a bond is undeniably sad. But the point of true, unconditional love is to want the best for the person you built a life with. The past 4 years I’ve been able to learn how to become a man. I’ve learned how to love and grow and see light rather than hate for sport. A single person made that possible. Again I won’t give too much away. But social media is a farce and I want this to be on my terms rather than have people draw conclusions. 

I’m happy and I feel strange saying that. I’m mourning a loss while simultaneously celebrating a new chapter. My only goal is to be able to say I tried my best in everything I’ve done. I did that. We did that. I’ll forever be a changed man with optimism and light and love to give those around me because someone I trust with my entire heart made me feel worthy of doing so. I’ve alluded to being sad in the past week. I’m sad that things are changing. Im sad that there is a loss. But the gain is so much more significant. I’ll never forget what I was taught and I gained a best friend in the process. I owe you. Thank you for showing me what I am. I’ll make sure to pass it on to everyone I meet. 

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